Posted in Blog, Exploring Life and Work with Patti Podcast, Podcasts

Exploring Life and Work with Patti (Podcast)

I have a new podcast Exploring Life and Work with Patti – From Chaos to Calm.

Welcome to Exploring Life and Work with Patti – From Chaos to Calm. Join me as we explore the good, the bad, and the chaotic in the life of a manager or supervisor.

This podcast is for you if you are a manager or supervisor who feels burnt out, stressed out, or overworked from your demanding job. Now, you’re looking to find some calm and balance in life, both inside and outside of work.

These monthly mini-podcast episodes inspire life and work strategies to maintain sanity within your busy day from chaos to calm.

I am your host Patti Oskvarek, a Leadership and Work-Life Balance Coach.

Follow “Exploring Life and Work with Patti” on all your favorite podcast listening platforms to get all the latest podcast episodes.

Let the adventure begin.

Posted in Blog, Podcasts

Episode 45 – Daily Habits to Prevent Depression During Stressful Times While Strengthening Your Relationships!

In this episode Angela and Patti will be discussing daily habits to prevent depression during stressful times and strengthen your relationships.

Click to Listen here.

The definition of depression according to the American Psychiatric Association website:

Depression is a common and serious medical illness that negatively affects how you feel, the way you think and how you act. Fortunately, it is also treatable. Depression causes feelings of sadness and/or a loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed. It can lead to a variety of emotional and physical problems and can decrease your ability to function at work and at home.

Angela recommends the Megaway Shakes. It has 13 powerfoods, like maca, ashwagandha, cinnamon, lucuma, barley greens, and the list goes on. Brigitte from the megaway formulated her shake to directly affect the mood and hormonal system of the body. You can find out about her shake at www.themegaway.com

Angela talks about Spiritual Mantras are really good for clearing the air in your home environment when things get stagnated by your thoughts and feelings. 

Forest therapy is used in Japan to treat depression and anxiety. Patti shared forest bathing technique in episode Episode 41 – How Spending Time in Nature Can Help You and Your Relationships.

Angela talks about the book that shares how we all carry trauma called “The body keeps the score” by Dr Bessel Van Der Kolk.

Angela shares about seeing the musical Come from Away in Sydney

For those of you interested in meditation as a way to touch your own light.

Angela is starting a new 8 week course on July 8, 2021 in the USA and July 9, 2021 in Australia. It’s meditation for relaxation and transformation where we explore how to transform old ways of being with yourself and learn how to relax, enjoy and dive deeper into your true energy – which is the energy of joy. Meditation for Relaxation and Transformation.

If you enjoyed the podcast.  How about becoming a monthly supporter of this podcast?   Click on the support button in the Anchor App.

For a one-time any amount support donation, click the Donate button below:

Thank you so much for listening.

DISCLOSURE: Please be aware that Angela and Patti may be sharing affiliate links in this podcast/post. Please know that we only ever share products and services that we use or have used ourselves and found great value.

#BuildingBetterRelationships #Depression #Anxiety #Podcast #BetterRelationships #PreventDepression #RelationshipPodcast #lifecoaching

Posted in Blog, Podcasts

Episode 44 – Accepting Responsibility for Choices in Your Relationships – The Good, the Bad and the Narcissist!

In this podcast episode, Angela and Patti discuss taking responsibility for your choices.

Click here to listen.

It’s becoming common now that people are starting to label and blame the end of a relationship on their former partner. Instead of taking responsibility for their choices within the relationship and the other person, they were a narcissist. Is it easier to blame everything on the other person instead of self-reflecting on what went wrong within the relationship?

What did you learn?

What will you look for before entering into a relationship next time?

What do you want from a relationship?

What are the deal breakers?

Angela talks about the book  Brain Wash by David Perlmutter. He has many studies showing that narcissistic behaviors are connected to the generations that use more social media. So that could make it easier for people to blame people for selfish behavior because it is a typical cultural attitude.

When self-reflecting, ask these questions to yourself:

*What did I learn?

*What will I look for before entering into a relationship next time?

*What do I want from a relationship?

*What are the deal breakers for me?

Patti wrote blog posts about Making Good Choices and A Workplace Phenomenon – the Narcissistic Manager.

Angela speaks about dance and meditation. Dance is about feeling yourself. Meditation is about seeing yourself. Both dance and meditation help you to look inward – not outward. Want to Dance with Angela?

If you enjoyed the podcast.  How about becoming a monthly supporter of this podcast?   Click on the support button in the Anchor App.

For a one-time any amount support donation, click the Donate button below:

Thank you so much for listening.

#podcast #betterrelationships #betterrelationshipathomeandwork #anchorpodcast #AcceptingResponsibility #Choices #BuildingBetterRelationships

DISCLOSURE: Please be aware that Angela and Patti may be sharing affiliate links in this podcast/post. Please know that we only ever share products and services that we use or have used ourselves and found great value.

Posted in Blog, Podcasts

Episode 43 – Managing Negative Emotions in Relationships Whether at Home or Work!

In this podcast episode Angela and Patti discuss how to deal with negative emotions and energy whether in the workplace or in your personal life.

Patti:  Being negative is easy, everyone is doing it.  How does it affect you in your career and personal life? You may lose a promotion or worse yet all relationships by being a constant complainer, talking bad about others, when displaying anger and hostility or a victim mentally.  I’ve heard some people say that being positive all the time is toxic. 

Why do you think that is?

Angela: Perhaps they see people being falsely positive without dealing with the underlying issues that are creating imbalance in the workplace or home. And without facing the real issues of sadness, anger or fear that go unaddressed when people are trying to be positive.  Some people are fearful of positive energy for fear that they can’t ever be happy. When you are addicted to suffering, it is very hard to enjoy someone’s happiness. Plus people from the beginning of humanity have had jealousy when they think that they can’t have what others have. So if you see someone too happy, it can trigger ancient fears that somehow you are missing out.

Patti: 

How do we change these situations from toxic to kindness?

What if people stopped watching the news?What if people smiled more?

What about looking at the good in others and appreciating each other?Do you think things would change for the better?

Patti: Angela, you have told me many times it is okay to show your emotions. 

To feel them and release them. 

How do you do that without taking it out on the other person or projecting those emotions on them?

Angela: Have you heard of Daniel Goleman’s book Emotional Intelligence?

1. Self Awareness of your Emotions.

2. Managing your Emotions.

3. Awareness of Social Relationships

4. Management of those Relationships.

Angela: The book “Noise” by Daniel Kahneman is looking at how companies can make better decisions and stop errors at the company level that cost the company thousands of dollars. 

Patti: Strategies to help stay positive?

  1. Walk away when drama is happening around you. Excuse yourself from the conversation.
  2. When there are unkind remarks about someone else, say something nice about that particular person. This action tends to halt the conversation.
  3. Plug in your headphones and listen to uplifting music.
  4. Recite Positive Affirmations.
  5. Journal about how you are feeling.
  6. Go for a quick walk and pray about the situation, listen to an uplifting podcast, music or recite positive affirmations.
  7. Concentrate on your work tasks.

For more tips on how to handle negative workplace environments Patti has a blog post series on Bad Leadership Styles.   We would love to hear your ideas and what you are doing with Managing Negative Emotions in Relationships Whether at Home or Work!

If you enjoyed the podcast.  How about becoming a monthly supporter of this podcast?   Click on the support button in the Anchor App.

For a one-time any amount support donation, click the Donate button below:

Thank you so much for listening.

#podcast #betterrelationships #betterrelationshipathomeandwork #anchorpodcast #managingemotions

DISCLOSURE: Please be aware that Angela and Patti may be sharing affiliate links in this podcast/post. Please know that we only ever share products and services that we use or have used ourselves and found great value.

Posted in Blog, Podcasts

Episode 42 – Building a Better Relationship with our Planet! (Podcast)

Summary of this podcast episode, Angela and Patti discuss building a better relationship with our planet and our environment.

During lock-down, it gave the planet time to heal in many ways; the air quality from pollution became better with fewer vehicles traveling. The beaches recovered due to fewer people visiting and the wildlife starting to populate. 

Where are you respecting energy?

Taking notice of where you respect, giving thanks, and reciprocating energy is an excellent example of being a good steward, yourself, your family, and your planet.

In the movement classes, Angela shares how to respect your body and listen to your body. This has been the easiest way for me to learn respect for energy. When we move together, we feel how we contain energy in the body and how we lose energy in the body. And in movement you can learn where you have habits in your body that disrespect your body or don’t listen to the natural flow of energy in your body that pushes the body. When we do the movement in nature, the elements of nature help us align and balance our bodies. And activity in nature, even just walking in nature, can show us how to be one with nature and respect it.  When we’re caught up in modern life, we fall into habits where we forget our own nature and own body, which makes us feel disconnected from the planet.

Reflection Questions:

What can you do to make a difference in the world we live in and your relationship with the planet?

What kind of relationship do you want with the planet?

What are your thoughts about air pollution, plastic waste in the ocean, and nuclear waste?

What can I do to support the environment?

When Patti is out camping or in nature, and I come across trash, I pick it up, take it home, and throw it in the trash. She remembers when I was visiting a friend in Hawaii, and we were getting ready to parasail, a woman was fishing out debris from the ocean with a net, and this man said to her, why there is so much trash in the sea it won’t matter. To her, it mattered.

Was she making a difference, yes, one less piece of trash in the ocean that day?

We would love to hear your ideas and what you are doing with improving  your relationship with the planet!

If you enjoyed the podcast.  How about becoming a monthly supporter of this podcast?   Click on the support button in the Anchor App.

For a one-time any amount support donation, click the Donate button below:

Thank you so much for listening.

#podcast #betterrelationships #betterrelationshipwiththeplanet #anchorpodcast #betterplanet

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts

Episode 40 – Finding Purpose Beyond Work – There is More to Life than Working! (Podcast)

In this podcast episode, Angela and Patti discuss Finding Purpose Beyond Work.  

A Summary:

Having some work-life balance keeps communication open and nourishes your relationships. Take time out weekly to cherish your family life, spend time with a friend, a hobby and make some time to rest, so your life is fulfilled?

Here are some self-reflection questions to ponder if you are overworking:Am I putting my work or career ahead of everything else? What is it doing to my relationships? Am I saying yes to an unreasonable workload and not taking time off or vacation? Am I connecting to my family? Do I have true friends? Am I happy? Do I smile? Am I kind to others at work?

What does being successful look like?

What is a satisfying life?

What is a purposeful life?

What is a meaningful life?

Purpose is not always about big-scale plans. Purpose is about meeting people who can help you get to the next stage of life. Many of the most important or valuable connections in life start by meeting other people and seeing what opportunities may come. 

To help create a work-life balance and purpose in life, Patti made an online course called – Incredible Work-Life Balance Hacks for Busy Leaders!

Angela helps business owners with spirit work. What are the spiritual reasons you incarnated to have this business or life? Your business and life are often a lesson to help you develop – it’s not only about the money. Of Course, there will be challenges and learnings about money. For more information on how to work with Angela go to – https://dancewithangelahealing.as.me/

If you enjoyed the podcast.  How about becoming a monthly supporter of this podcast?   Click on the support button in the Anchor App.

For a one-time any amount support donation, click the Donate button below:

Thank you so much for listening.

#purpose #findingyourpurpose #MarryingPurposeandFinancialSecurity 

Posted in Blog, Podcasts, Reiki

Episode 36 -How Can Reiki Healing Help You and Your Relationships? (Podcast)

In this episode, we discuss what Reiki is and how it can heal you and your relationships.  

Reiki is a Japanese technique for relaxation, which also promotes healing. Reiki’s performed through light touch, or the hands are hovering over someone or by distance. Warm and soothing energy flows from the practitioner’s hands into the recipient, promoting relaxation and releasing tension.  Disclaimer: Reiki is not a substitute for medical or psychiatric treatment, and it does not replace them. 

A Reiki treatment takes about an hour and is carried out with the recipient fully-clothed (except for shoes) and resting comfortably with pillows and a blanket on a massage table or other stable flat surface, which is a comfortable height for the Reiki practitioner to work. The Reiki practitioner’s hands are placed gently on or above the body and kept still for a few minutes. The recipient may feel heat or tingling from the practitioner’s hands or notice a flow of energy within the body. Recipients usually feel calm and relaxed during and after the treatment; however, some may feel energized.

Reiki energy moves through the body and releases blocked energy. When you are stuck mentally and emotionally in a loop when having a relaxing Reiki treatment, it can help you release that particular situation to move forward, which will help you balance your emotions towards that situation or relationship.  

To find out more about Reiki visit Patti’s website:  https://coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com/reiki-services/

Angela will have a Facebook live every Monday in 2021, at https://www.facebook.com/transformedrelationships where you can breathe for 7 minutes and focus on what you want to manifest and focus on during the week. 

Angela is starting a new meditation class. To find out more click here.

How about becoming a monthly supporter?   Click on the Support button in the Anchor App.

For a one-time any amount support donation, click the Donate button below:

Thank you so much for listening. 

#Reiki #EnergyHealing #BetterRelationships #RelationshipCoaching #ReikiHealing #ReikiTreatment #ReikiSessions #Distant Reiki

Posted in Blog, Inspirational Moments, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts

Episode 33 – The Damages and After Effects of People Pleasing to Yourself and Others! (Podcast)

In this episode, Angela and Patti discuss People’s Pleasing and how it can disappoint relationships, whether within yourself and relating to others.

People Pleasers are very helpful and usually don’t say no when someone asks them for a favor. They spend a great deal of time doing things for others and disregard their own needs. Being a People Pleaser can cause disappointment because not everyone has the same kind heart or good intentions. They can attract people who will take advantage of their generosity.

Angela and Patti share experiences of being a people pleaser, and the lessons learned.

What are a few traits of a People Pleasing?

* Seeks approval and words of affirmation

* Fears being alone

* Feelings of being selfish or guilty for not meeting the needs of others

* Irritable when others don’t take your advice

* Being the “go-to person” when someone is in need

* Covering for or taking the blame for others

* Giving money away, which can lead towards depletion

What are some characteristics of a people pleaser?

Wants to be liked by others seek to earn it by pleasing, rescuing, giving away money and things, or flattery. They may even tell little white lies to spare people’s feelings when they don’t want to do something. Wants reassurance through acceptance and affection they can’t express their needs openly and directly. They make others feel obligated to reciprocate.

The people-pleaser may want to earn acceptance by helping others. They put other people’s needs ahead of their own. When they do this, they become resentful and sometimes bitter because the other person doesn’t do the same. They harbor anger, regret, and resentment from feeling used.

At times they may feel responsible for other people’s behavior. Saying “yes” becomes a habit, and for others, it can be an addiction that makes them feel needed in someone else’s life. Feelings of security and self-confidence come from getting the approval of others. Our very first podcast episode was When to Say No and When to Say Yes!

Angela uses clairsentience and kinaesthetic in her healing. It is a huge help to not jumping into the emotions, which means developing a stronger relationship with your intuition, which has taken her years. It has also taught her that feeling for a person is not the same as helping them.

The stories created by a people pleaser to justify their actions and choices are often subtle and cover up the real story that you feel is not enough to state what you want. The damage of believing your stories that justify people-pleasing is that you will delay discovering your true worth by behaviors that keep you locked in suffering other people’s emotions or stuck in guilting others and yourself for not meeting your needs.

Patti and Angela have years of experience overcoming people-pleasing. So the answer is listening to others who overcome people-pleasing to find true self-worth and ways of communicating that in the world. And you can find out more about working with us individually below.

If you want to learn about Angela’s kinaesthetic healing online movement classes, you can receive a free class by signing up for her newsletter here: https://mailchi.mp/0c610663e337/subscribe-to-angelas-newsletter

A People Pleaser may struggle with work-life balance, and Patti has created a self-study at your own pace 21 Days to Optimal Work/Life Balance Program that addresses how to say no for people pleasers and make better boundaries, so others don’t take advantage of them.

If you have a topic or a question for us, please leave us a message on the Anchor App. Did you enjoy our podcasts? Please leave a review.

How about becoming a monthly supporter.Click here and then choose the amount of monthly support in Anchor. By supporting this podcast with donations, it will help us continue to produce future episodes. Thank you so much for listening.

For a one-time any amount support donation, click the Donate button below:

Thanks for listening!

#peoplepleaser #peoplepleasing #betterrelationships #podcast #anchorpodcast #relationshipsatworkandhome #relationshipcoaching #podchaser

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Podcasts

Episode 32 – Criticism – Can You Handle It? – Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti (Podcast)

In this episode, Angela and Patti explored criticism and how to respond without it overtaking emotions. To listen to the full episode, click here or on the media player below.

When we thought about this topic, we wanted to know how you handle constructive feedback in your relationships and the work environment.

Some say that Millennials and Gen Z are more sensitive and don’t respond proactively to criticism but instead get demotivated by criticism. So if you’re a Millennial, Gen Z, or any generation, we would love to hear your point of view.

  1. How do you feel about criticism? 
  2. Do you want it reframed in positive language?  
  3. Can you handle someone saying they don’t like something about what you did? 
  4. Can you distinguish between criticism about something you did or said versus about you personally? 
  5. Do you find that the older generation’s language comes across critically, and you don’t like it?

    Please let us know your thoughts click here ➡️ voice message

Patti shares her experiences on handing criticism in the workplace, and Angela shares how we react from past perceptions of ourselves when we get criticized. Patti and Angela share how to move beyond emotions when receiving criticism and tips on how to respond.

Do you enjoy our podcasts? How about becoming a monthly supporter.  Click here then choose the monthly support amount in the Anchor. By supporting this podcast with donations, it will help us continue to produce future episodes. Thank you so much for listening. 

For a one-time any amount support donation, click the Donate button below:

 

#dealingwithcriticsm #criticism #workcriticism #careercriticism #howtorespondtocriticism #podcast #anchorpodcast #relationshipsatworkandhome  #relationshipcoaching #worklifebalance #lifecoaching #listen #thanks  #betterrelationships #relationshippodcast  #relationshipbuilding  #handlingcriticism

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts

Episode 31 – Journaling to Save Relationships! Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti (Podcast)

(Patti) In this episode, Angela and Patti discussed the benefits of journaling to save relationships.  

To listen to the full podcast episode click on the link here ➡️ Episode 31 – Journaling to Save Relationships or on the media player below.

(Angela) Journaling is a great way to connect to oneself, work out solutions when struggling with personal relationships or work problems.

(Patti) Let me tell you about how I learned about journaling. I belonged to a women’s group many years ago. Plynn Gutman, Certified Professional Coach, Reiki Master, and Author gave a talk on journaling benefits. She has written a journaling book with prompts called Your Journal Companion365 Writing Prompts to Heighten Awareness of Self and Others.

My journal is what I want it to be, what I need it to be, each time I open it and put my pen to the page. This is what a journal is meant to be.
~ Plynn Gutman, Your Journal Companion 365 Writing Prompts to Heighten Awareness of Self and Others

(Patti) Plynn makes the journaling process easy with an entire year’s worth of thought-provoking writing prompts. She explains the emotional and physiological benefits of personal writing gives instruction on several powerful writing techniques and offers tips on “how, where, and when” to start the process.

(Patti) In that presentation, Plynn made journaling fun, easy, and relaxing. We did a few different journaling techniques with her, and I have been hooked on journaling ever since.  

(Angela) I started journaling when I was 12 yrs old. At an age where I had very raw feelings, I discovered that I couldn’t put them anywhere; I could put them in my journal. This was in the 80s. For some reason, at school, my teacher had introduced that concept of a journal instead of a diary. And she taught us that a journal was where you could explore writing, but not writing for others, writing for yourself. And being a socially awkward kid who felt I didn’t belong, I found it the perfect place to write my feelings. I also felt my English teacher – Mrs. Casey, was permitting me to dispose of feelings that I didn’t want to share publicly.

(Angela) Later on, Mrs. Casey read our journals, which were part of our English work, and I wasn’t afraid of her reading my journal. And her encouragement to keep writing was key to me continuing the process of having a private space to dive into myself, my feelings, my creative thoughts, ideas, and the not so great stuff too, or my shadow. I always remember that time at school as a clear moment my teacher was giving me a way out of feeling uncomfortable in myself, and gently encouraged me to write out my feelings so that they had a safe space to be heard.

(Angela) After Mrs. Casey read my first journal, I kept my journals private, and they have been a constant resource for me to write my thoughts, ideas, and later in life, my realizations from my soul and my meditation practice.

(Angela) I often wonder what would have happened if I didn’t have that first year of writing encouraged by a teacher. Would I have written anyway? I don’t know. 

(Angela) I do know that the habit of using a journal started very young for me and has saved my relationships by giving me a space to write my feelings, see my feelings and not project my feelings on others because my priority of journaling gave me the habit of writing my feelings in an attempt to externalize them, to try to understand them and this developed to a deeper level the most important relationship, the relationship with myself by writing my feelings and reading them, and developing an ongoing relationship with myself so that I could understand my feelings.

(Angela) To this day – I can go back and read some of the old journals, and still discover things about myself. Some things have stayed constant over time, and some things have changed so significantly, and that has helped me learn the power of recording and watching my journey in life through journaling.

(Patti) When I was probably about 9 to 10 years old, my Mom or Grandmother gave me a diary that had a lock and key. I wonder what happened to it. It would have been fun to read what I wrote in it today.

(Angela) Patti – I have a question: When you discovered the power of journaling with PlynnHow did you start using it in your life and relationships?

(Patti) Great question Angela, journaling was new to me. It opened up so many things for me. Instead of verbally sharing my feelings and emotions on someone else I started using journaling. This helped me not project my anger or judgment on others. Plynn’s book and app have daily journaling prompts, which helped me get into the habit of journaling. She made it easy to want to journal. Then I moved on to journaling on my own. When upset or needed to brain dump or brainstorm for solutions to problems, I would journal whether in a relationship or feelings that needed to be released. These are private thoughts that I was feeling at that moment. Sometimes I would burn or shred what I wrote. I also keep an idea journal, career journal, and a scattered journal. A scatter journal is a journal that I put random thoughts in. My made-up word for the scattered journal. I watched a documentary that Agatha Christie would write down ideas all over the place in journals.  

(Patti) What are some of the biggest challenges in starting to journal?

  1. Finding time?
  2. Getting started?
  3. Or not knowing how?

(Patti) Choose a time to journal daily. It can be when you get up in the morning, on your lunchtime, or before going to sleep. You may want to use journaling prompts or self-reflect about your day. Journaling can open up your mind to change and inspire you to pursue your dreams, aspirations, and goals. It allows you to alter your thoughts, which block you. Find someplace peaceful, quiet that you can think and write.  

(Patti) When the weather’s nice, I like to journal outside on my patio. Some of my best journaling experiences are when on vacation or camping. Being outdoors is very refreshing.  Schedule journaling time and be consistent. You can journal anywhere.

Some of my best journaling experiences are when on vacation or camping. Being outdoors is very refreshing.  Schedule journaling time and be consistent. You can journal anywhere.
~ Patti Oskvarek, Leadership and Work-Life Balance Coach

(Patti) What do you need for journaling? 

  1.  Pen and Paper or
  2. A notebook or journal or
  3. There are journal apps or
  4. Journaling Prompts on Pinterest, Writing Coaches Websites, etc.

(Angela) Tip: You can choose a time of day that suits your journal’s focus and the best way to maximize your consciousness.

(Angela) The morning is good for setting your intent and energy for the day.

(Angela) The night before sleep is good for reviewing problems, patterns, and whether you achieved your goal for the day, or if you set an intention for your relationships to be calm in the morning, in the evening, you can review – How did this go?

(Angela) I sometimes set myself a journal exercise, for example at noon to review my feelings, so I set the alarm and check in with my feelings at noon and write.  

(Angela) What time of day do you naturally feel like looking inward? If you don’t have a habit of looking inward, you can start by setting a time to focus on one question. Write on it – and then after one week of journaling, ask yourself, was this the best time for me to journal? If not, ask yourself what a better time to journal is. Sometimes we create obstacles to journaling because you’re trying to write at the wrong time of day that is the best time of day to connect with yourself and your intuition. I have clients who have resistance to journaling, and sometimes it’s because they are writing at the wrong time of the day or week.

(Angela) If you are not really convinced that journaling can change you in a way that brings outer world success, you can measure this success. When you journal over time, you can watch the change in your connection to your inner world, which changes the way you act or behave in your relationships.

(Angela) Journaling over a period of time with gradual and consistent practice brings deep change. It’s like water dripping on a rock over time. You get this beautiful shape formed by the water constantly moving through the rock.

(Angela) Patti has some specific questions to answer in your journal about relationships which could start to change the way you understand yourself and your relationships. And these questions you can come back to over time to build an ongoing relationship with yourself. This is how coaches use questions to write answers to develop self-knowledge and deepen your relationship with yourself.

(Patti) Here is some Journaling prompts to deepen and save your relationships: Most of these prompts can be used with any relationship type—friendship, romantic, family, or work.  

  1. Describe what you want in the relationship?
  2. Describe what you don’t want in the relationship?
  3. What is the relationship like at the moment?
  4. What is working well in the relationship?
  5. What one thing can you do to make the relationship better and more of what you want it to be?
  6. What does love mean to you?
  7. What does love mean to your partner?
  8. What is meaningful about the relationship?
  9. What are some of your expectations for the relationship?
  10. What is meaningful about your relationship?

(Angela) Number 6 – What does love mean to you that could be a whole book for one person!

(Angela) Questions from a coach can make journaling a lot more structured for anyone unsure where to start when it comes to your relationships. We’ll have those questions in the show notes.

(Angela) And the beauty of a question like number 6 – What does love mean to you – you can keep writing on this topic for many years.

(Angela) I want to invite listeners if there is anything that persistently bugs you – like – why do people act the way they do, why are people unkind – these are great topics to start writing on. I used to write on desire because I was obsessed with understanding why do we want things? Why do we want a person, why do we want an experience in life – and this was a large part of what I wrote on – to understand what I was curious about in the human condition.

(Angela) Curiosity is something that journaling can help you discover more and feed into your relationships.

(Angela) If you have a love relationship that has gotten stale, often there is a deeper need to understand something.

(Angela) It’s very easy to complain about your partner, being ‘not this or not that.’

(Angela) But how often do you get curious about how your partner thinks, why they do the things they do – and also what inspires them.

(Angela) When you journal on questions like:

(Angela) 10 What is meaningful about your relationship?

(Angela) You can start to share deeper things with your partner.

(Angela) That question Patti reminds me about another topic we want to have as a podcast – Can you say I love you? I find people are so unaware of what is the meaning of a relationship – and don’t know how to say “I love you” because they never had the time to contemplate what is the significance of a person to them – or Why a relationship has meaning and value for them. This is why coaching is so valuable – We give clients these value-based questions to help them find meaningful information.

(Angela) And you can always use these questions to go deeper with yourself in the writing process. When you find deeper meaning in your relationship, you can value it and look at it differently instead of getting stuck on what the blocks in the relationship will be. If you don’t know what is meaningful in a relationship, you can’t save the relationship because you don’t know why you want the relationship.

If you don’t know what is meaningful in a relationship, you can’t save the relationship because you don’t know why you want the relationship.
~ Angela Ambrosia, Love and Relationship Coach

(Patti) Journal even when you are feeling disengaged, upset, disappointed, or confused about your relationship, this can be one of the best times to reflect on the relationship situation and get out every ugly thing that has been left unsaid.  

(Patti) Journal about happy times in your relationships and refer back to those moments to remind you why you love that person. Create happy moments or gratitude journals.  

(Patti) Why is this good for relationships?  

(Patti) When you journal about your feelings, you are not taking those emotions out on others. It lets you brain dump and removes all toxic thoughts. Once those emotions and thoughts have been exhaled you can move into rational solutions. 

(Angela) Some questions on feelings when you get to a block in a relationship, or your feelings are hurt or coming up.

  1. What am I feeling?
  2. Why am I feeling this?
  3. Is this my feeling – or am I picking up someone else’s feelings?

(Angela) Sometimes, especially if you are an emotional or sensitive person, you get lost in a feeling thinking it is yours, but in relationships, we also are feeling and impacted by the feelings of those we are in a relationship with especially close loved ones, children, parents, lovers, and friends. And even co-workers or neighbors have a deep impact on us especially if we are around them regularly.

(Angela) Patti, Have did you use journaling to save relationships in the work environment?

(Patti) Yes, I had a work journal. I used it to problem solve, work out issues, and emotions. I also gave my staff at the time a work journal. Some used the journal, and some did not. It was their personal choice whether to use it or not. Dumping your thoughts into the work journal helped in so many ways, instead of projecting emotions on others. It gave time to self-reflect instead of a knee-jerk reaction to a solution or problem. I wish I used it more than I did. It could have changed outcomes for the better. Daily work interactions are very much learning experiences when working with others. There are different points of view and work backgrounds. Reflecting on the situation through journaling gives you a new perspective of maybe I could do it differently with a better result.  

(Angela) Patti, How did you use journaling to problem solve and brainstorm at work? 

(Patti) When something comes up that I need to figure out, pulling out the journal helps make lists of how to solve the problem or situation by brainstorming solutions or ideas to develop different ways to tackle issues or communicate with others. Then brainstorm with others the ideas you’ve come up with. So when I brainstorm, I freestyle the process with no editing. When you edit while you write, your critic’s brain comes out, and you use the flow of ideas. No idea is a bad idea when in the brainstorming process. Working with others in a group journaling on the whiteboard ideas is an excellent way to come with something you wouldn’t think of. Working as a team and journaling is a way to throw out ideas towards solutions. Ask a question to the team and have them journal for solutions. I’ve seen great ideas come up when doing this. Individuals have private time to think and then feel comfortable sharing ideas when they feel safe. People need to feel that they won’t be criticized or reprimanded for their ideas for people to share.  

(Angela) Tip: I have recently reviewed some journals where I did a dump of some quite dark emotions. On the one hand, it was good to see that I no longer feel that way. However, I also burned some of the old journals that I felt were no longer me, and the words or feelings in the journal were not something I want to keep. I tore out a few pages, and a few whole journals went into the fire. Sometimes, the writing isn’t necessary to stay forever; sometimes, the writing is to be kept to remind you in your future of where you came from, and how different or connected that is to where you are now.

(Angela) So if you have something that is particularly dark – you can always burn it, which releases the energy.

(Angela) And if you burn something and later think – oh, I wish I hadn’t destroyed it – you can always make a quiet time, sit and think. What was the relevance of what I wrote to what I am moving through now in my life?

(Angela) The significance of what you wrote will still be inside you somewhere, even if your words are not the same. The meaning and feeling will be accessible, and you can connect to it, and journal on the significance of that past piece of journaling. 

(Patti) I find that journaling is good for you in so many ways. If there is something, you never want to be seen by others, destroy it by burning or shredding it. Those are your personal thoughts in time, and it is an excellent way to release them. Keep your journals in a secure private place. There are journal apps, and you can make a secure password-protected document on your computer for journaling as well.  

(Angela) In Patti’s 21- Days Optimal Work/Life Balance Workshopwww.CoachingforInspirationwithPatti.com there is a section on journaling, and throughout the program, you have a workbook with questions.  

(Angela) Try out journaling and let us know if it has made a positive difference in your relationships with others.  

(Patti) If you have a topic or a question for us, please leave us a comment or voice message on the Anchor App. You can also listen to this podcast on most major podcast listening platforms like Apple and Spotify.

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Here is a short audio clip of BBR Podcast Episode 31 – Journaling to Save Relationships!


DISCLOSURE: Please be aware that Angela and Patti may be sharing affiliate links in this podcast/post. Please know that we only ever share products and services that we use or have used ourselves and found great value.

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