Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

Don’t Be That (Guy) Person!

Lately, I have been hearing this phrase when people are talking about their coworkers.

Don’t be that guy! 

Employers and staff may use this term when someone has committed bad behavior or done something procedurally wrong.  In some organizations they use this term “Don’t be that (Guy) Person” for humiliation or an example of what not to do. The poster child of what not to be in the workplace.

Is shaming an affective management strategy? 

Some say yes, because it represents what not to do in the workplace and halts people from doing it.

How does the “Don’t be that Person” cope with being the scapegoat?

Some quit, some stay and deal with the whispering behind their backs and the harsh judgement while others totally checkout (isolate themselves).

Maybe some organizations want this type of shaming to keep things under control.  If so, something is definitely wrong.  Someone once told me you live in a fantasy world if you think this type of management strategy will change. 

What do you think?


Comments are welcome. What are your thoughts on this topic?

For more information about Becoming a Better Leader [e-Book] Click here to download your copy.

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts

Podcast Episode 11 – Tips and Tricks When Working With Someone You Don’t Like!

Angela and Patti share communication tips at work.  How to stay in a job and manage difficult relationships.  How to ask yourself the questions to determine how to manage your emotions.  

Podcast Episode 11 – Tips and Tricks When Working With Someone You Don’t Like!

What does this meme tell you?

Take a look at yourself.  
Is the relationship problem really you?  
What is it about this person that triggers you?  
Is it past behavior? Do they remind you of someone?  Do they remind you of something you don’t like within yourself?

Angela: Is this a group issue or is it an issue just for you. Do others in workplace share your issue? This points to something missing in the group environment.

Use the PAUSE and REFLECT Technique
PAUSE for three to five seconds before responding.  This gives you time to change your response or don’t respond at all.

What if you receive a nasty passive/aggressive email from your boss or coworker?  
Before responding back to the email.  Write out your response.  Don’t send it!  Walk away for awhile.  Sleep on it, if you don’t have to respond within the same day.  Then rewrite it when you have calmed down.  Have someone else read it that you trust to help tone it down before hitting the send button. 

What to consider:

Should I stay at my current employment or move on?

Make a list of “why to stay” and “why to go”.  Be upfront and honest. No holding back from the truth of the matter! Look at which column has the most reasons?  Make your decision from there.  Is there more good reason to stay?  Or reasons to leave.  

For more information about Becoming a Better Leader [e-Book]  Click here to download your copy.

Here are other blog posts from Patti to explore.

How to Incorporate Pause into Leadership https://wp.me/p3W3dA-VCY

Feeling Stuck in a Dead-End Job?  https://wp.me/p3W3dA-UTu

Warning Signs – Is It Time To Look For Another Job? https://wp.me/p3W3dA-UWs

Are you interested in one to one coaching with Patti?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact Patti at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

Are you interested in one on one coaching with Angela? Angela has one on one coaching program called Transformed Relationships, you can book a Relationship Clarity Call at https://loveandrelationshipcoach.setmore.com and discover more about the program.

If you have a relationship topic you would like us to discuss, please email your relationship topic to BBRatHomeandWork@gmail.com

If you found this podcast helpful. Please share with others. Push the like button on Anchor and leave us an encouraging review.  Listener support is very much appreciated. Thank you for listening!

Angela and I would like to thank  Anchor for hosting this podcast.

Want even more tips about creating better relationships? Come join our Facebook group called Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela & Patti Facebook Group

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

The Leadership of Pete Nelson – the Treehouse Master


My husband and I enjoyed watching the TV show the Treehouse Masters on the Animal Planet channel.  Pete Nelson is the Treehouse Master.  He is a gentle and kind man.  He is passionate about his job.  He loves to have fun and designs each treehouse very special for his clients.

Treehouses lift the spirits. They inspire dreams. They represent freedom: from adults or adulthood, from duties and responsibilities, from an earthbound perspective. If we can’t fly with the birds, at least we can nest with them. – Pete Nelson

The treehouse(s) that Pete Nelson and his crew build are unique.  Pete meets with his clients and designs what they want.  He spends time getting to know his client(s) by asking questions and really listening to their desires.  He is friendly and open.  Pete gets very excited exploring and finding the perfect location with the right type of tree(s) to support the treehouse. When his clients see the treehouse for the first time their expressions of joy are priceless.

When his clients see the treehouse for the first time their expressions of joy are priceless.

Pete Nelson Leadership Style:   He meets with his crew, gives them instructions and they build the treehouse. Pete gets out of the way and let’s his crew do their jobs.  You can tell the staff love their work.  They joke around but pay attention to detail.  They work in all kinds of weather and still enjoy it.

What can we learn from Pete Nelson leadership style?

  • It is okay to laugh and have fun at work
  • Spend time getting to know your client(s) by asking questions and really listening
  • Take every client(s) challenging request and make it a reality
  • Give your client more than they ever dreamed possible
  • Get out of the way and let your staff do their job
  • Trust your staff that they will do a great job when you are not around

Discussion Question:

What can you incorporate starting today in your leadership from Pete Nelson example as a leader?

Comments are always welcome.  You can always use your initials or anonymous for your name, if this makes you feel more comfortable to respond.  🙂   Did you find this helpful?  If so, please share this blog post with your colleagues, friends, and family on all your social networks!  Thank you. 🙂

For more information about Becoming a Better Leader [e-Book] Click here to download your copy.

Are you interested in one to one coaching with me?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

The Leadership of Inspector Edmund Reid

I like mysteries whether reading books or watching TV series.  Currently, I am watching the TV Series on Netflix called Ripper Street based in the East End of London in the Whitechapel district in the 1889’s and beyond.  There is violence, cruelty, corruption and human trafficking.  There are times it is hard to watch due to the nature of these acts.  The TV shows starts six months after the infamous Jack the Ripper’s murders. The main character is Inspector Edmund Reid.  Inspector Reid and his team had been in charge of the investigation of the Jack the Ripper’s murders. Imagine the stress, guilt and dissappointment they felt from not finding the murderer.

Inspector Reid is a workaholic driven by his failure to capture Jack the Ripper, his daughter Mathilda is missing and presumed dead and his wife Emily left him.  Inspector Reid works most nights in his office trying to solve cases to make Whitechapel safer. He is obsessed with his job and it takes Inspector Drake his former Sergeant for him to see the importance of appreciating his staff and their loyalty to each other.  

Inspector Reid has many good qualities, but is very much human and has made some devastating mistakes throughout his career and personal life.  His values were tempted, tested and sometimes failed him.

He works day and night to protect his district from evil and corruption but at times his emotions get the better of him.  Does he care too much?  Maybe?  That is probably one of his best qualities, as well as one of his worst.  Caring too much for the greater good and wanting to make his part of the world a better place.

Caring too much will swallow you whole.    Detective Chief Inspector Frederick Abberline said to Inspector Reid

Now, why do I say caring too much?  Sometimes when you care too much it becomes a down fall for a leader because you trust others, betrayal happens and then you become jaded by those actions.  Getting hurt by others who are doing things for their own personal gain and will step on anyone to get what they want.

This happened to Inspector Reid.  One of his constables was spying on him for another Inspector who was corrupt.  Due to the betrayal it cost lives and changed Inspector Reid forever.

As a Leader, have you care too much and been betrayed?

When you are in a management position you will be betrayed.  People have their own personal agenda’s and a leader’s values are tested.  That may sound harsh but it does happen.

We battle monsters and we become monsters.   That Abyss you talk about it’s not only around or out there, it is inside us.  It’s a blackness that swallows all light.  – Inspector Drake to Inspector Reid

Inspector Reid response – We are the abyss.

How does a leader fall? 

🦋  When they lose site of their vision, values and purpose.  

🦋  Sometimes those values, visions and purpose are ripped away. 

🦋  Sometimes they get lost in someone else’s personal gain.

🦋  Sometimes the leader becomes jaded, by betrayal and trust is damaged.

No leader is perfect.  We all have some sort of flaws.  A good leader has empathy and does care.  By not letting disappointment and lack of vision destroy you is the key to staying sane in a world of disarray.  

Discussion Question:

As a leader, have you ever cared too much?

Comments are always welcome.  

Please share this blog post with your colleagues, friends, and family on all your social networks!  Thank you. 🙂

Are you interested in one to one coaching with me?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

 

 

 

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

Feeling Stuck in a Dead-End Job?

How do you know when you are in a dead-end job?

I have spoken to a lot of people who feel they are stuck in a dead-end job.  When Sunday comes around they dread thinking about going into work the next morning.  On Monday mornings they hit the snooze button multiple times and force themselves out of bed.  On the way to work, they push themselves with positive affirmations or the opposite with “I hate my job” self-talk.

🦋  Do you feel like you could do your job in your sleep?

🦋  Are there no advancement opportunities where you work?

🦋  Do you feel hateful and resentful when you walk through your workplace?

🦋  Do you get any acknowledgement for a job well done?

Well, here are some questions below to ask yourself.  Answer them with the first reaction you have.

🦋  Am I learning any new aspects in my position?

🦋  Are my job duties challenging to me?

🦋  Do I enjoy going to work everyday?

🦋  Am I motivated and strive to increase my productivity level?

🦋  Do I feel I am making a difference?

🦋  Are my coworkers positive at work?

🦋  Am I positive at work?

If you answered no to these questions, you may be feeling stuck in a dead end job.

What are some options to improve my career situation?

Create a Career Journal to keep track of your career goals, action steps, certifications, accomplishments, achievements, and references all in one area.

Making or adding to your career journal is a great way to be organized and to refocus on your career path.

What’s in a Career Journal:

  • Career goals and ideas
  • Keep track of career progress
  • Lessons learned
  • Coaching strategies
  • Advice from mentors
  • A private place to vent career disappointments
  • Keep positive affirmations and quotes
  • Gain a new perspective
  • Resume, cover letters, interview tips, interview questions, thank you letters, recommendations, references and certifications
  • Mission statement and values
  • Develop a career action plan
  • Keep motivated and inspired
  • To celebrate the small successes

How to Get Started:

  • Get a large binder; put all your career paperwork and ideas into it
  • Then decide if you want to put all your information into a computer document, on-line journal, a book journal, or a binder
  • Organize by categories
  • Add to your career journal regularly
  • Keep it in a secure place

Self-Reflection Questions for Career Journal:

  • What did I learn?
  • What did I accomplish?
  • Did I receive any compliments?  If so, what was it and who said it?
  • How did I make a difference?
  • Did I have any setbacks and how did it affect me?
  • How can I change my situation and get new career opportunities?
  • Where should I start networking to meet new people and look for better job opportunities?

What to consider:

Should I stay at my current employment or move on?

Make a list of “why to stay” and “why to go”.  Be upfront and honest. No holding back from the truth of the matter!

What’s keeping me here?

Are there other options?

If, so what are they?

  • A Transfer within the company?
  • Start job hunting?
  • Hire a career coach?
  • Go back to school and learn something new?
  • Retirement?

After making and reviewing the list to “stay or go”.  What did this list tell you?

Take Away:
Don’t stay in a job where there is no opportunity for advancement.  Take a leap of faith and try something different.  You will have a career purpose with meaning again.  Whatever decision you make to either stay or go; having a career journal will keep you organized and focused on your career goals as well as helping you be ready for the next career opportunity.

Comments are always welcome.  

Please share this blog post with your colleagues, friends, and family on all your social networks! 

Are you interested in one to one coaching with me?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

Patti’s groups, podcasts, online course and more

Work-Life Balance Hacks for Busy Leaders who LOVE their Career but Want MORE in Life! 

This course is for leaders who are crazy busy, working 24/7 and want something more in their life.  7 easy hacks to create some personal life balance in this so-called busy life!

Enroll today for $25.00

 

How about creating Harmony in Your Life; click on the link  21- Days Optimal Work/Life Balance Workshop.

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Do you want better relationships? If yes, come hang out with Angela Ambrosia, Love & Relationship coach and me while listening to all of our podcast adventures called Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela & Patti Podcast

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Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby Has A Great Work Ethic but Lacks Work-Life Balance


 

I recently started watching the long-running TV series Midsomer Murders on Netflix.  The main character Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby is very dedicated to his job and capturing the murder(s).  He is excellent at his job.  While on a murder case he is very focused on his work, 24/7 until the murders(s) are caught and charged.

Chief Inspector Barnaby loves his job.  It gives him purpose.  He coaches and trains his sergeants to be dedicated, knowledgeable, reliable and very good detectives.

Trust is something hard to win, easy to lose and never to be taken lightly. ~ Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby, Midsomer Murders

In one episode Sargeant Dan Scott was getting rough with a suspect. After the incident and they were both alone in the vehicle Chief Inspector Barnaby told Sgt. Scott, you will not conduct yourself like that ever again under my watch. As a leader, Inspector Barnaby is not afraid to address bad behavior with his employees.

Do you see a lesson in this? ~ Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby, Midsomer Murders

Due to Chief Inspector Barnaby’s dedication to his job, he ends up disappointing his wife Joyce continuously.  He is a good man.  He loves his wife, but his job always comes first.  He does have a habit of not showing up when working a murder case.

He will set up dinner dates with his wife while he is still investigating his case.  He may even take her to a restaurant and be watching a suspect. Joyce will get up early to cook him breakfast and usually he rushes out without eating her prepared meal.  They will plan on meeting up for a party or some other occasion and he either arrives late or not at all.

The cleverest lies are those were already inclined to believe. ~ Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby, Midsomer Murders

Joyce wants to spend more quality time with her husband, but he is always on the job 24/7.  Does any of this sound familiar? 

In one episode, Chief Inspector Barnaby was suppose to meet his wife Joyce at home and go with her to a party.  He didn’t show up and Joyce went without him and had a wonderful time.  He was locked in a cellar with Sgt. Scott all night and she didn’t even realize he didn’t come home.  I think it surprised him that she wasn’t even worried about him.

In another episode, Joyce and his daughter Cully wanted to purchase a houseboat. Thinking a houseboat would create more family time together.  The houseboat Joyce and Cully were looking at turned out to be the killers.  No houseboat was purchased.

In another episode, Joyce wanted Chief Inspector Barnaby to start planning for his retirement and to become a mystery writer.  She thought he would make more money and be around more.  It wasn’t Chief Inspector Barnaby’s idea of retirement after the murder investigation.

What now? I’m going to have my cake and eat it.~ Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby, Midsomer Murders

In the TV show Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby is considered a family man. When he does arrive home for dinner, he is usually called out again.

How does his marriage survive?  No work-life balance here!

Of course, he is a fictional character.  

Do you think this is why he is still in a relationship? 

 

If this blog post article really resonated with you. I have a new online course called Work-Life Balance Hacks for Busy Leaders who LOVE their Career but Want MORE in Life!   This course is for leaders who are crazy busy, working 24/7 and wants something more in life than just their career.   

Work-Life Balance Hacks for Busy Leaders who LOVE their Career but Want MORE in Life!   The course has 7 easy hacks to create some personal life balance in this so called busy life!

Enroll today for $25.00

Want more tips and strategies on Work-Life Balance come and join the Work-Life Balance with Patti Facebook Group

Interested in one to one coaching?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

 

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

I USED TO BE A PEOPLE PERSON THEN PEOPLE RUINED IT!

I used to be a people person then people ruined it! ~ unknown

My husband and I were at WalMart and we saw this phrase on a T-shirt.  I held up the T-shirt and said I am going to buy this.  Being a leadership and work-life balance coach my job is to encourage people not to feel this way.  So why did I want to buy the T-Shirt?  Well, to be honest I had many days that I felt this way.

Have you ever felt this way?  I know I did throughout my career especially when knee-deep in the day-to-day grind (Bull Sh*t).  There were days I would go home and think why are people so hateful, judgmental, petty and disrespectful.  Myself included.

What happened to kindness, empathy and compassion?

Reflection Questions About Daily Interactions With Ambitious People

Why is everything about who can “one up” each other?

Why is “knowledge power”?  Instead of sharing it.

What happened to being genuinely happy for a coworker and recognizing their accomplishments?

Why is being so “busy” acceptable and “ignoring” family okay?

When will these concepts change in leadership?

Is anybody else out there ready for a mind shift in some basic decency and respect towards others? I know I am!

How about you?

To answer the 🔥 burning question:  Did I buy the T-Shirt?Yes, I did. 🙂

P.S.  I have received so many comments from people when I wear this T-Shirt.  Like: That shirt is so funny.  Oh, that shirt is so true.  I love that shirt! Why do you think that is?

Would love to see your thoughts and comments about this topic. ~ Patti

Comments are always welcome and please share this post with your colleagues, friends, and family on your social networks! Sharing is caring.

For more information about Becoming a Better Leader [e-Book] Click here to download your copy.

How about creating Harmony in Your Life; click on the link  21- Days Optimal Work/Life Balance Workshop.

Want “one to one coaching” with Patti – email me patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

 

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

Day 5 of 5 Day Power of Positivity Challenge

Welcome to Day 5 of the 5 Day

Power of Positivity Challenge.

Today’s challenge is to Compliment instead of Gossip.

I was listening to the Happier Podcast with Gretchen Rubin awhile back and they were talking about using the practice of reverse gossip.  This means when someone is gossiping about another person to you.  Say something nice about the person being gossiped about.  The gossiper usually stops talking about that person.  I have tried this technique a few times and it really has worked.

A compliment is a precious gift, so why aren’t we giving them out more?

Offering a sincere compliment makes people feel valued and accepted.  Awareness of the good in others helps us to think more positive.  Not getting sucked into gossip and the courage to walk away from it can reflect a lot about someone’s character.  If more people said nice things about each other instead of the dreadful, this world would be a much happier place.  Walk away from hurtful mean words.  Most gossip isn’t true anyway and it causes anguish to the person who is being gossiped about.  No good comes from gossip.  A compliment can change someone’s day from feeling very low to experiencing worthiness.  When receiving a compliment, listen, smile and then say thank you.

When someone gives you a compliment, believe them. ~ Molly Simms

The Day 5 Challenge:

  • Give at least one compliment each day to someone.  Be genuine and honest with your compliment.  Some examples: Write a note, letter or send a text to someone and tell them what they mean to you or thank them in person for something nice they did.
  • Use the technique of reverse gossip and/or walk away from the conversation.

A compliment is verbal sunshine! ☀️~ Robert Orben

We all have negative emotions and it’s okay.  We can’t be positive every moment of the day, that is literally impossible.  Bad stuff happens.  Even upbeat happy fun loving people aren’t feeling it all the time.  You can strive to be a good person and give a kind compliment.  You may never know what that nice gesture meant to someone and how it could brighten their day for the better. ☀️ ~ Patti

How about making someone’s day today by giving them a compliment! 🙂

The best way to cheer yourself up is to cheer everybody else up! ~ Mark Twain

Thank you for spending time with me during this 5 Day challenge.  My wish for you is that these daily challenges inspired more positivity within your life and shined out to those around you! ☀️

Share your compliment experiences in the “leave a reply” below. I would love to see your comments and what types of reactions you got! ❤️

How about creating A Balanced Life Especially for You; click on the link  21- Days Optimal Work/Life Balance Workshop to begin your special journey of creating more balance and positivity in life.

Want “one to one coaching” with Patti – email me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

Bad Leadership Styles Series

Bad Leadership Styles Series

Thank you for joining me with the Bad Leadership Styles series. I know as a leader, I have been all of these at one point or another. Recognizing it and realizing there are going to be bad days and we are going to mess up.

Breathe, pause, pray about it, then regroup and apologize when needed. Forgive and let go.

Mistakes and bad experiences help us grow to become better leaders. My intention for this series is to give you insight and wisdom on your own personal leadership journey.

A truly great Boss is hard to find, difficult to part with and impossible to forget!  ~ unknown

I hope this series inspired you to become a great boss. ~ Patti

In case you missed any of the Bad Leadership series here are the links below:

The Destruction of the Absentee Leader

The Hazardous Results of the Inflexible Leader

The Signs of a Workplace Bully Leader

The Dangers of Leadership Ghosting

The Draining of Leadership Vampires

For more information about Becoming a Better Leader [e-Book] Click here to download your copy.

Want “one to one coaching” with Patti – email me patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

 

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

The Draining of Leadership Vampires

The Draining of Leadership Vampires

This is a bonus post of the Bad Leadership series.  I was talking to one of my coaching friend’s Plynn Gutman about the Bad Leadership blog series.  She said to me, you have to do an extra one on Leadership Vampires who steal employees successes and claim them as their own.  In other words, does not give credit where credit is due.  This blog post is for you Plynn and thank you for the suggestion.

How does it feel when your boss takes credit for your work?  Not good at all. People don’t feel satisfied or appreciated when they are not acknowledge for their contributions.  This happens and is a common practice within some organizations.

How do you handle this when it happens?  (Pause and Reflect)

What is the organization culture?  

Do they recognize people ideas or suggestions?  

This will make a huge difference on how to react.  Is it acceptable to stand up and take credit for your ideas.  Will your direct supervisor support you when you do?  Is it worth standing up and saying look at me?

I believe, yes, everyone should be recognized for their contributions. However, some managers don’t give credit where credit is due.  Remember to pick your battles carefully especially when you work for Vampire Leaders.

Ask yourself:

Do I want to announce to everyone, hey, this was my idea?  

If yes, (Stop, Pause and Reflect) – Will this halt any future career opportunities for me?

If no, schedule time to meet with your boss privately to discuss it.

When I think of Leadership Vampires, it is a Boss that sucks the life right out of you.  They are harsh, aggressive, demanding and belittling.  They show favoritism and leave you feeling beat down mentally and physically.  When around them you may feel anxious, sick, angry or depressed.  They have a habit of reprimanding staff in front of others and micro-managing employees time.  They lack empathy and drain the positivity and creativity right out of you.

How do you deal with this type of Leadership?

  • Don’t react
  • Be calm
  • Listen patiently
  • Don’t interrupt
  • Don’t disagree
  • Pick your battles wisely
  • Apologize when necessary
  • Give them nothing to feed on. They love drama!

Take away:

Working for a Vampire leader is exhausting.  Keep calm and don’t react to the harshness.  Work hard and listen carefully.  Say your daily positive affirmations throughout the day to keep yourself going. You got this!

Comments are always welcome and please share this post with your colleagues, friends, and family on your social networks! Sharing is caring.

For more information about Becoming a Better Leader [e-Book] Click here to download your copy.

How about creating Harmony in Your Life; click on the link  21- Days Optimal Work/Life Balance Workshop to learn more.

Want “one to one coaching” with Patti – email me patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com