Posted in Blog, Building Better Relationships Podcast

Episode 65 – Changing the Perspective of Not Taking Everything Personally In Relationships

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Click to listen to Episode 65 – Changing the Perspective of Not Taking Everything Personally In Relationships.


This podcast topic came from a listener’s request about not taking everything so personally.

Why do some people or cultures make it look so easy not to take things personally and others take every little thing to heart?

Is it the environment of how we are raised?

Or do some people have DNA that can let things roll off their back or turn the other cheek with ease?

Are some people more sensitive than others because they are empathic or highly sensitive in nature? 

How to overcome hurt by someone’s harsh words:
Remind yourself it’s about them not about you at that moment.  Maybe you did something they didn’t like. What did their words really say?  Was it about the behavior?  Or something else?

One tip is to watch your conditioning:
What are the annoyed and angry voices in your head regarding the household chores?
You will hear your expectations, you may hear your parents, but you will hear the frustration of someone else not doing what you want and thinking about what should be done.

This is your conditioning. So once you hear it. Simply say – ok – that’s my conditioning. It’s not that this person hates me or is insulting me – or wants me dead or ignores me.

This is my expectation about how things should be done. And then if you’re really angry maybe don’t speak with the other person!

But then think about how you could say to them what you want. But don’t expect them to do it the way you want because that may not be their conditioning!

Some strategies to help deal with and not take things personally:

  • Listen to happy, soothing, calming, or spiritual music when feelings start to surface within you.
  • Find something fun to do to help redirect thoughts.
  • Practice meditation and pray for “Letting Go” of things people have said.  
  • Watch your reactions and triggers when around certain people. Become aware of those thoughts and assumptions. Reflect on why these reactions are happening and how you can release or address them?
  • With friendships, coworkers, partners and family how has taking things personally affected these relationships?  What can I do to change it for the better

Are some people more sensitive than others because they are empathic or highly-sensitive in nature?

Do you feel you’re Feeling too much?

Feeling everything about you – you are the center of attention – are you the most important thing in a relationship?

What is a relationship?

A relationship is not just about you.

A relationship is like a dance – two people having a tango – push-pull. Not about just you and your feelings. ~ Angela Ambrosia

For meditations to help with hurt in relationships here is the video series “Choose the Relationship” by Angela Ambrosia. The meditations are at the end of the videos.

 To work with Angela

To work with Patti

To learn more or purchase the Building Better Relationships Journal and Meditation go to

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