Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Polls

Tips on How to Reverse Rude Behavior in Meetings

As a leader having efficient and effective meetings are so important to every aspect of running a successful business.  Meetings that aren’t productive are a waste of valuable time and cost the company money.

Have you ever been in a meeting and there is at least one person or all attendees that have nothing positive to say about anything?

I remember one day I finally snapped in a meeting.  My leader wasn’t listening and was talking over of me, while I was trying to explain why my team needed some technical help.  So I started raising my voice over my leader.  I was so upset with myself.  That day I came to realize this isn’t for me and I didn’t like being push to respond that way.  I knew that this was the norm for the group, always trying to one-up, and I didn’t want to play anymore.  I started putting my exit plan into action, it was time for me to remove myself from working there.

What are rude behaviors in meetings?

  • Interrupting the person speaking
  • Not listening, acting bored or lack of engagement
  • Being disrespectful to the speaker
  • Two people talking privately among themselves while someone else is speaking
  • People are just plain hostile to each other
  • Arguing over whose point is right
  • Over talking each other
  • Sarcastic mean comments to the speaker or each other
  • Being very judgmental to each other
  • One-upping each other
  • Participants taking everything that is said very personally due to the hostile interaction
  • Embarrassing the host or leader with malicious remarks

I have been in group meetings where all of these actions have happened, been the target, and been a participant of some of these disrespectful behaviors.  I am not proud about the way I acted, discourteous and unprofessional at times, but that was acceptable to be heard.  Was this behavior a way to conquer and get what was needed?  Not really.  Did anything get resolved?  Most of the time nothing was accomplished.

What lesson did I learn?  I wanted things to be different and I probably cared too much.  I was tired, beaten down, disrespected, and unhappy with the results.  I knew that nothing was going to change in these meetings and I had to either accept it, change my thinking or leave.

On the bright side my team at the time had a code of conduct for our meetings.  People were respectful to each other and follow them.  If someone didn’t follow the code of conduct including me, the team would call you out on it.  Things got resolved and people felt heard.

What happened to common courtesy, collaboration and respectfulness towards each other?

How can we change the behavior?  I believe it takes one person at a time, and the leader to lead by example and reverse this unprofessional behavior.

Here are some tips:

  • Set up rules of conduct for meeting(s).  Go over them at the beginning of each meeting as a reminder.  Have the code of conduct on the agenda template.  As time goes on with the same group of attendees, the code of conduct will not have to be quoted every time, because it is on the agenda.  I would recommend that if you have a new person attending the meeting to read the code of conduct at the beginning of the meeting.
  • When someone says something negative, turn to them and say something positive about the topic or person.
  • When someone intentionally breaks meeting etiquette, politely remind them or refer to the code of conduct.
  • As the leader focus on following the code of conduct, leading by example, and positive meeting etiquette will become achievable by all participants.
  • Redirect the “off topic” discussions to be addressed later.

Takeaway:

Having a set code of conduct and behavior etiquette is so important to running successful meetings.  Being courteous and respectful allows everyone to speak, to be heard, participate, engage and this is when great results will happen. Be organized and prepared.  As a leader, we lead by example and if we are not focused and engaged; our employees will not be either.  ~ Patti

Comments are always welcome.  You can always use your initials or anonymous for your name, if this makes you feel more comfortable to respond.  🙂   Did you find this helpful?  If so, please share this blog post with your colleagues, friends, and family on all your social networks!  Thank you. 🙂

For more information about Becoming a Better Leader [e-Book] Click here to download your copy.

Are you interested in one to one coaching with me?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

Check out the training I did on How to Say No, Set Up Professional and Personal Boundaries in Ruby McGuire’s Rock Your Fabulous Biz Facebook Group [Video]

Check out the training I did in Ruby McGuire’s Rock Your Fabulous Biz Facebook Group.

To watch the video click here

I discussed the following topics:

🦋 How to Say No Easily to the Things You Really Don’t Want to Do

🦋 How to Set Up and Keep Personal Boundaries

🦋 How to Set Up and Keep Business Boundaries

 

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

How Do We Reattach with Work at the Start of a New Day?

This question below was recently tweeted to me and few other coaches by Robbie Stakelum @Robbie_BXL.  He attached a new study on reattachment.

In professional and personal coaching we often talk about importance of detaching from work outside of working hours.  But how do we reattach with work at the start of the day? Do we have routines that set ourselves up for a productive day?

What does being reattached to work mean?

According to the new study Sonnentag and Kühnel (2016: 380) described reattachment to work as rebuilding a mental connection to one’s work after a non-work period (e.g., a free evening or a weekend). Reattachment means thinking about the upcoming workday and mentally preparing for it.

My Response:

I thought I would spend some time answering this question here in a blog post. There is no way I could respond with 140 characters on Twitter.   Plus this study and question has me fired up BEWARE!  

Yes, I feel all employees should be reattached when they are at work.  People need to be focused, motivated and actually do their job!

At the start of the work-week or start of the work-day, of course, you need to mentally prepare for it, however, my regular audience are the people who don’t turn off work and are constantly thinking about work 24/7, they don’t unattached from work at all, this is why they need work-life balance strategies.

I know there are people who don’t reattach at work.  They do the bare minimum not to get fired and are just going through the motions.  In their mindset, they are just collecting a paycheck. They make their coworkers and supervisors angry because they are not lightening the workload.  Yes, they really do need to step it up, reattach and take pride in working.  Do they ever wonder why they don’t get promoted or respected.  Well, it is because they are not attached to doing their job.

It’s time to reattach!

You have come back from the weekend or a vacation.  I’m glad you enjoyed yourself and relaxed.  Now, it’s time to get back to work.

How do you get reattached to work?  It’s quite simple.  Motivation comes from within the person.  You have a job to do.  Time to get refocused on your job duties.

🦋  During your commute get into the right mindset of going back to work.

🦋  When you get to work prioritize your workload.

🦋  Concentrate on the things you need to get accomplished and complete them.

Conclusion from the Study:

Taken together, this study brought to light the multiple pathways by which reattachment to work in the morning relates to work engagement during the day. Results suggest that reattaching to work before actually starting work sets the tone for the workday through anticipating high task focus, mobilizing positive activated affect, and recognizing available job resources. Task focus, positive activated affect, and the availability of job resources, in turn, enable high work engagement. Reattachment to work in the morning is a low-effort strategy that employees can use in order to start their workday in an optimal way. Organizations may develop norms and routines that help employees reattach to work and that support them in smoothly transitioning into the workday.

My view of the conclusion of the study:

I do agree with the study that reattachment to work in the morning has a positive effect on your day and work performance.   I don’t agree with the study, that it is up to organizations to develop norms and routines to help employees reattach to work and support them in smoothly transitioning into the workday.  I believe that motivation comes from within the employee, not the organization developing norms and routines for them.

Takeaway:

Employees need to take responsibility and accountability for their own work performance.  It is not up to the organization to develop norms and routines for reattachment to work.  Who wants to be known as (“the slacker” or “that person”) who everyone dislikes because they aren’t focus on their job duties and others have to carry their workload.  Be responsible, accountable, motivated, engaged and take pride in your work performance.  It really is easy to reattach yourself to your work, if you set your mind to it. ~ Patti

Comments are always welcome.  

Please share this blog post with your colleagues, friends, and family on all your social networks! 

Are you interested in one to one coaching with me?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

Patti’s groups, podcasts, online course and more

Work-Life Balance Hacks for Busy Leaders who LOVE their Career but Want MORE in Life! 

This course is for leaders who are crazy busy, working 24/7 and want something more in their life.  7 easy hacks to create some personal life balance in this so-called busy life!

Enroll today for $25.00

 

How about creating Harmony in Your Life; click on the link  21- Days Optimal Work/Life Balance Workshop.

Stay up to date and receive the Coaching for Inspiration with Patti quarterly newsletter by clicking HERE.

Follow Coaching for Inspiration with Patti for daily updates on FACEBOOK  and TWITTER

Do you want more work-life balance strategies? Come and join my new Facebook group called Work-Life Balance with Patti

Do you want better relationships? If yes, come hang out with Angela Ambrosia, Love & Relationship coach and me while listening to all of our podcast adventures called Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela & Patti Podcast

Want even more tips about creating better relationships? Come join our Facebook group called Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela & Patti Facebook Group

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

Feeling Stuck in a Dead-End Job?

How do you know when you are in a dead-end job?

I have spoken to a lot of people who feel they are stuck in a dead-end job.  When Sunday comes around they dread thinking about going into work the next morning.  On Monday mornings they hit the snooze button multiple times and force themselves out of bed.  On the way to work, they push themselves with positive affirmations or the opposite with “I hate my job” self-talk.

🦋  Do you feel like you could do your job in your sleep?

🦋  Are there no advancement opportunities where you work?

🦋  Do you feel hateful and resentful when you walk through your workplace?

🦋  Do you get any acknowledgement for a job well done?

Well, here are some questions below to ask yourself.  Answer them with the first reaction you have.

🦋  Am I learning any new aspects in my position?

🦋  Are my job duties challenging to me?

🦋  Do I enjoy going to work everyday?

🦋  Am I motivated and strive to increase my productivity level?

🦋  Do I feel I am making a difference?

🦋  Are my coworkers positive at work?

🦋  Am I positive at work?

If you answered no to these questions, you may be feeling stuck in a dead end job.

What are some options to improve my career situation?

Create a Career Journal to keep track of your career goals, action steps, certifications, accomplishments, achievements, and references all in one area.

Making or adding to your career journal is a great way to be organized and to refocus on your career path.

What’s in a Career Journal:

  • Career goals and ideas
  • Keep track of career progress
  • Lessons learned
  • Coaching strategies
  • Advice from mentors
  • A private place to vent career disappointments
  • Keep positive affirmations and quotes
  • Gain a new perspective
  • Resume, cover letters, interview tips, interview questions, thank you letters, recommendations, references and certifications
  • Mission statement and values
  • Develop a career action plan
  • Keep motivated and inspired
  • To celebrate the small successes

How to Get Started:

  • Get a large binder; put all your career paperwork and ideas into it
  • Then decide if you want to put all your information into a computer document, on-line journal, a book journal, or a binder
  • Organize by categories
  • Add to your career journal regularly
  • Keep it in a secure place

Self-Reflection Questions for Career Journal:

  • What did I learn?
  • What did I accomplish?
  • Did I receive any compliments?  If so, what was it and who said it?
  • How did I make a difference?
  • Did I have any setbacks and how did it affect me?
  • How can I change my situation and get new career opportunities?
  • Where should I start networking to meet new people and look for better job opportunities?

What to consider:

Should I stay at my current employment or move on?

Make a list of “why to stay” and “why to go”.  Be upfront and honest. No holding back from the truth of the matter!

What’s keeping me here?

Are there other options?

If, so what are they?

  • A Transfer within the company?
  • Start job hunting?
  • Hire a career coach?
  • Go back to school and learn something new?
  • Retirement?

After making and reviewing the list to “stay or go”.  What did this list tell you?

Take Away:
Don’t stay in a job where there is no opportunity for advancement.  Take a leap of faith and try something different.  You will have a career purpose with meaning again.  Whatever decision you make to either stay or go; having a career journal will keep you organized and focused on your career goals as well as helping you be ready for the next career opportunity.

Comments are always welcome.  

Please share this blog post with your colleagues, friends, and family on all your social networks! 

Are you interested in one to one coaching with me?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

Patti’s groups, podcasts, online course and more

Work-Life Balance Hacks for Busy Leaders who LOVE their Career but Want MORE in Life! 

This course is for leaders who are crazy busy, working 24/7 and want something more in their life.  7 easy hacks to create some personal life balance in this so-called busy life!

Enroll today for $25.00

 

How about creating Harmony in Your Life; click on the link  21- Days Optimal Work/Life Balance Workshop.

Stay up to date and receive the Coaching for Inspiration with Patti quarterly newsletter by clicking HERE.

Follow Coaching for Inspiration with Patti for daily updates on FACEBOOK  and TWITTER

Do you want more work-life balance strategies? Come and join my new Facebook group called Work-Life Balance with Patti

Do you want better relationships? If yes, come hang out with Angela Ambrosia, Love & Relationship coach and me while listening to all of our podcast adventures called Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela & Patti Podcast

Want even more tips about creating better relationships? Come join our Facebook group called Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela & Patti Facebook Group

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Leadership Inspiration

New Online Course by Coaching for Inspiration with Patti

Work-Life Balance Hacks for Busy Leaders who LOVE their Career but Want MORE in Life! 

This course is for leaders who are crazy busy, working 24/7 and want something more in their life.  7 easy hacks to create some personal life balance in this so-called busy life!

Enroll today for $25.00

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby Has A Great Work Ethic but Lacks Work-Life Balance


 

I recently started watching the long-running TV series Midsomer Murders on Netflix.  The main character Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby is very dedicated to his job and capturing the murder(s).  He is excellent at his job.  While on a murder case he is very focused on his work, 24/7 until the murders(s) are caught and charged.

Chief Inspector Barnaby loves his job.  It gives him purpose.  He coaches and trains his sergeants to be dedicated, knowledgeable, reliable and very good detectives.

Trust is something hard to win, easy to lose and never to be taken lightly. ~ Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby, Midsomer Murders

In one episode Sargeant Dan Scott was getting rough with a suspect. After the incident and they were both alone in the vehicle Chief Inspector Barnaby told Sgt. Scott, you will not conduct yourself like that ever again under my watch. As a leader, Inspector Barnaby is not afraid to address bad behavior with his employees.

Do you see a lesson in this? ~ Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby, Midsomer Murders

Due to Chief Inspector Barnaby’s dedication to his job, he ends up disappointing his wife Joyce continuously.  He is a good man.  He loves his wife, but his job always comes first.  He does have a habit of not showing up when working a murder case.

He will set up dinner dates with his wife while he is still investigating his case.  He may even take her to a restaurant and be watching a suspect. Joyce will get up early to cook him breakfast and usually he rushes out without eating her prepared meal.  They will plan on meeting up for a party or some other occasion and he either arrives late or not at all.

The cleverest lies are those were already inclined to believe. ~ Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby, Midsomer Murders

Joyce wants to spend more quality time with her husband, but he is always on the job 24/7.  Does any of this sound familiar? 

In one episode, Chief Inspector Barnaby was suppose to meet his wife Joyce at home and go with her to a party.  He didn’t show up and Joyce went without him and had a wonderful time.  He was locked in a cellar with Sgt. Scott all night and she didn’t even realize he didn’t come home.  I think it surprised him that she wasn’t even worried about him.

In another episode, Joyce and his daughter Cully wanted to purchase a houseboat. Thinking a houseboat would create more family time together.  The houseboat Joyce and Cully were looking at turned out to be the killers.  No houseboat was purchased.

In another episode, Joyce wanted Chief Inspector Barnaby to start planning for his retirement and to become a mystery writer.  She thought he would make more money and be around more.  It wasn’t Chief Inspector Barnaby’s idea of retirement after the murder investigation.

What now? I’m going to have my cake and eat it.~ Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby, Midsomer Murders

In the TV show Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby is considered a family man. When he does arrive home for dinner, he is usually called out again.

How does his marriage survive?  No work-life balance here!

Of course, he is a fictional character.  

Do you think this is why he is still in a relationship? 

 

If this blog post article really resonated with you. I have a new online course called Work-Life Balance Hacks for Busy Leaders who LOVE their Career but Want MORE in Life!   This course is for leaders who are crazy busy, working 24/7 and wants something more in life than just their career.   

Work-Life Balance Hacks for Busy Leaders who LOVE their Career but Want MORE in Life!   The course has 7 easy hacks to create some personal life balance in this so called busy life!

Enroll today for $25.00

Want more tips and strategies on Work-Life Balance come and join the Work-Life Balance with Patti Facebook Group

Interested in one to one coaching?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

 

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts, Polls

Building Better Relationships [Podcast] – Episode 6 – How’s Your Love Life Competing With Your Phone?

Episode 6 podcast – How’s Your Love Life Competing With Your Phone?   In this podcast Patti and Angela discuss how the cell phone can enhance and limit relationships with others.  They also talk about their personal relationships with their own phones. 

Click here to listen – How’s Your Love Life With Your Phone? 

Take the poll and then listen to Patti and Angela answer to this question.  You may be surprised!

Here’s the quote Patti read in the podcast:

Please share this podcast with others, push the like button on Anchor and leave us an encouraging review.

Discover Patti’s new online course:  INCREDIBLE WORK-LIFE BALANCE HACKS for BUSY LEADERS
This course is for leaders who are crazy busy, works 24/7 and wants something more in their life.  The course has 7 hacks to create some balance in this so called busy life! coaching-for-inspiration-with-patti.teachable.com/

Check out the ENERGY BODY OF SELF ACCEPTANCE PROGRAM 

Put Your Relationship with yourself as a priority and discover a simple energy system with movement and exercises that empower you to accept yourself, overcome old habits and discover what love is that allows self acceptance to happen effortlessly. https://bit.ly/2BMG79s

Read Angela’s blog post Turn OFF Your Phone and Get Turned ON 

Angela and I would like to thank our sponsor Brandless for supporting our podcast.  To learn more about Brandless click here on the link.

Want even more relationships tips? Come join our Facebook group called Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela & Patti Facebook Group

Are you interested in coaching with Patti?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts

Building Better Relationships at Home and Work [Podcast] – Episode 5 – What is Being Authentic?

Episode 5 podcast – Angela and Patti discuss “What is Being Authentic?”

Click here to listen – “What is Being Authentic?”

Patti’s view: A truly authentic person doesn’t put on a mask and become someone they are not or change to fit in.  They express their true thoughts, feelings and views without apologizing.  Being authentic is having integrity and being true to oneself and others.

Angela’s view: Sharing without forcing people to agree.  Sharing without proving you are right or anyone is wrong.  Sharing from your heart.  Sharing to get understanding between people.  Being in the heat of anger and needing to stand up and fight for what you believe in.

What is being authentic mean to you?

Please share this podcast with others, push the like button on Anchor and leave us an encouraging review.

Angela and I would like to thank our sponsor Brandless for supporting our podcast.  To learn more about Brandless click here on the link.

Want even more tips about creating better relationships? Come join our Facebook group called Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela & Patti Facebook Group

Are you interested in coaching with me?  I have coaching packages available.  Contact me at patti@coachingforinspirationwithpatti.com

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts, Video

Building Better Relationships [Podcast] Episode 4 – Beyond Comparison and Accepting One-Self


In case you missed the Facebook Live Video where Angela Ambrosia, Love & Relationship Coach and Patti Oskvarek, Leadership & Work-Life Balance Coach discuss Beyond Comparison and Accepting One-Self.

Or

You can listen to the Podcast Episode 4 – Beyond Comparison and Accepting One-Self.

Please share this podcast with others, push the like button on Anchor and leave us an encouraging review.

Angela and I would like to thank our sponsor Brandless for supporting our podcast.  To learn more about Brandless click here on the link.

Also, come and join the Building Building Relationships Facebook Group. We share all kinds of things about creating better relationships. 

Please feel free to share, comments and questions are always welcome.   

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Personal Inspiration

Self Employment and Work/Life Balance [Guest Blogger]

Self Employment and Work/Life Balance by Rebecca Ronane

I am living in France and the cultural attitude to work and play is sometimes very different to the Anglo-Saxon.  The month of November has two holidays the 1st  All Saints Day and  the 11th Armistice day and often as it happened this year with the 1st it fell on a Thursday, therefore the ‘pont ‘ (bridge) is taken which is the Friday, followed by the weekend and ‘voila’ you have your four days!  Joie de Vivre (the Good Life) is taken seriously here! In fact 2018 claimed 12 public holidays and then depending on how long you’ve worked you will have a bountiful  annual paid one too.

Does that mean the French style is a lazy one, no not at all, it happens to be at number 14 of the most productive countries in the world while my own country the UK doesn’t appear in the top 15! Does this  mean that more days off, lead to better productivity, and happiness, for worker and boss alike?  Japan the country with the least depression apparently, but the highest suicide, has a regular 40 hour week, but people there are well-known for putting in an extraordinary amount of overtime. It’s tricky to find out which country in general is doing work/life balance correctly. In the end it is left to ourselves to get it right!

In my work-world which has been the self employment one, work/life balance  interestingly can sit on a fine line. I’ve been a tour director (leading/organising groups on holidays) and for many years one worked 15 hours a day, or even more for 6/7 months then a 5 months free, which may sound idyllic, however the mental stress of worrying where your next job might come from, often eradicates the potential pleasure. I’m lucky to have had an understanding  partner in the same profession, but for those  trying to settle back into a balanced life style it can be difficult. Finding the perfect scenario is placing boundary lines within the structure of your working life and  managing to say ‘No’ to a job to save your sanity, not an easy option when organising your own finances and responsibilities.

Self employment might mean working for non scrupulous boss bullies, it’s tricky when you want that ‘job’ which someone else who might have a different set of values or simply feels they have to put up with being bullied as long as money is coming in.  No benefits of any kind, but perhaps less tax  seems appealing, but unless your discipline has stretched to creating plans for your future you can end up being at a loss.

Creating your own business from home appeals to me no end, no boss except yourself, no-one telling you when or what time you must start except yourself, no-one holding you accountable except yourself!

Ok, yourself has to be the perfect time manager, the perfect boundary liner, when  your partner starts a conversation on what we might be eating tonight and whose going to do the shopping. The self discipline to eliminate self distraction, whether it might be family, friends, calls and social media is another milestone.

There are so many pros and cons in whatever work structure you find yourself in, the most important is that you have the wisdom  and discipline to nourish all your needs. The majority of us have to work, to earn money, to be constructive and valued, but all of us will need to counter-balance the necessities to stay healthy in mind and body.

Boundaries and confidence to move away from work situations which don’t make you happy could be the answer. Self discovery to find out what makes you jump for joy, because certainly we all deserve to have happiness in our daily lives at work and at play. ~ Rebecca Ronane 

Images by rawpixel.com

About Rebecca Ronane:
I am a Briti living in the south of France with my husband and scruffy dog Myrtle. After thirty years in the travel industry and in my fifties I found Life Coaching and was overwhelmed at the difference this can make to people’s lives, so I decided to study and become one myself! Having reinvented myself I know how to unleash the Magic that women have later in their lives whether personal, or business. I have always worked with groups and I currently run Cappuccino coaching in Aix en Provence a program for like-minded women to explore confidence boosting topics.
My journey has also led me to creating the successful Network Provence a networking group for women to promote their business/project or socialise, meetings which take place on a monthly basis.
During the summer months I am still actively involved in taking organised groups around Europe, as well as my own coaching vacations here in Provence named ‘Holiday Retreats in Provence’.