Posted in Blog, Inspirational Moments, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts

Episode 33 – The Damages and After Effects of People Pleasing to Yourself and Others! (Podcast)

concentrated ethnic businessman giving folder to female employee in workplace
Photo by Sora Shimazaki on Pexels.com

In this episode, Angela and Patti discuss People’s Pleasing and how it can disappoint relationships, whether within yourself and relating to others.

People Pleasers are very helpful and usually don’t say no when someone asks them for a favor. They spend a great deal of time doing things for others and disregard their own needs. Being a People Pleaser can cause disappointment because not everyone has the same kind heart or good intentions. They can attract people who will take advantage of their generosity.

Angela and Patti share experiences of being a people pleaser, and the lessons learned.

What are a few traits of a People Pleasing?

* Seeks approval and words of affirmation

* Fears being alone

* Feelings of being selfish or guilty for not meeting the needs of others

* Irritable when others don’t take your advice

* Being the “go-to person” when someone is in need

* Covering for or taking the blame for others

* Giving money away, which can lead towards depletion

What are some characteristics of a people pleaser?

Wants to be liked by others seek to earn it by pleasing, rescuing, giving away money and things, or flattery. They may even tell little white lies to spare people’s feelings when they don’t want to do something. Wants reassurance through acceptance and affection they can’t express their needs openly and directly. They make others feel obligated to reciprocate.

The people-pleaser may want to earn acceptance by helping others. They put other people’s needs ahead of their own. When they do this, they become resentful and sometimes bitter because the other person doesn’t do the same. They harbor anger, regret, and resentment from feeling used.

At times they may feel responsible for other people’s behavior. Saying “yes” becomes a habit, and for others, it can be an addiction that makes them feel needed in someone else’s life. Feelings of security and self-confidence come from getting the approval of others. Our very first podcast episode was When to Say No and When to Say Yes!

Angela uses clairsentience and kinaesthetic in her healing. It is a huge help to not jumping into the emotions, which means developing a stronger relationship with your intuition, which has taken her years. It has also taught her that feeling for a person is not the same as helping them.

The stories created by a people pleaser to justify their actions and choices are often subtle and cover up the real story that you feel is not enough to state what you want. The damage of believing your stories that justify people-pleasing is that you will delay discovering your true worth by behaviors that keep you locked in suffering other people’s emotions or stuck in guilting others and yourself for not meeting your needs.

Patti and Angela have years of experience overcoming people-pleasing. So the answer is listening to others who overcome people-pleasing to find true self-worth and ways of communicating that in the world. And you can find out more about working with us individually below.

If you want to learn about Angela’s kinaesthetic healing online movement classes, you can receive a free class by signing up for her newsletter here: https://mailchi.mp/0c610663e337/subscribe-to-angelas-newsletter

A People Pleaser may struggle with work-life balance, and Patti has created a self-study at your own pace 21 Days to Optimal Work/Life Balance Program that addresses how to say no for people pleasers and make better boundaries, so others don’t take advantage of them.

If you have a topic or a question for us, please leave us a message on the Anchor App. Did you enjoy our podcasts? Please leave a review.

How about becoming a monthly supporter.Click here and then choose the amount of monthly support in Anchor. By supporting this podcast with donations, it will help us continue to produce future episodes. Thank you so much for listening.

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Thanks for listening!

#peoplepleaser #peoplepleasing #betterrelationships #podcast #anchorpodcast #relationshipsatworkandhome #relationshipcoaching #podchaser

Posted in Blog, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts

Episode 30 – Getting Over Mistakes and the Fears of Getting It Wrong! Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti (Podcast)

In this podcast episode, Angela and Patti discussed the fear of getting it wrong. How to accept we aren’t always going to be perfect, and that’s okay.

To listen to the full podcast episode click on the link ➡️ Episode 30 – Getting Over Mistakes and the Fears of Getting It Wrong!

❤️ Why are we so hard on ourselves when we make a mistake?

Mistakes happen, and owning up to them makes you a better person. Hiding mistakes or blaming others isn’t good for your reputation or your relationships. For some people, the fear of making a mistake can paralyze them to the point of not taking any action at all.

Here are some questions to ponder:

❤️ Why do you think people are afraid to fess up to their mistakes?

❤️ Is it about looking bad in front of others?

❤️ Is it that if they admit to making a mistake, they may lose a job or, worse, someone they love or admire?

❤️ Is it fear of being embarrassed, mocked, or teased?

❤️ What are some mistakes that are better left unsaid? Are there situations that you shouldn’t confess?

Making mistakes helps us learn what not to do, grow more knowledgeable, and become successful. As the saying goes, I’ve tried that, done that, and I learned from it.

❤️ How do you get over and move on from a mistake?

Patti wrote a blog post in November of 2019 on workplace shaming called “Don’t Be That (Guy) Person!” “Is shaming an effective management strategy?” Listeners – We would love to hear your thoughts on these questions.

How can these circumstances of overcoming the fear of mistakes change and having the courage to admit it?

When making a mistake and getting caught, why is it hard for some to admit it and apologize?

Getting it wrong happens, but sometimes our inner critic can beat us up to the point of being paralyzed or afraid to take action. What can we do?

❤️ Self-Reflect on what happened.  What can I do to fix this situation?  Can I fix it?  What can I do differently next time?

❤️ Journal about it. Continue to write and get out of all those emotions. The disappointment, hurt, shame, your inner critic, etc.

❤️ Acknowledge the mistake and be humble.

❤️ Apologize; keep it simple and sincere. I am sorry.

❤️ Accept the consequences and do what it takes to fix it or make it better when possible.

❤️ Recite positive Affirmations and reflect on all the good things you have accomplished.

❤️ Turn that negative experience into a positive by learning from it.

❤️ Everyone makes mistakes. This is how we become a better person from these experiences.

Do you want to dance with Angela, you can find out more about her online movement classes click on the link ➡️ https://dancewithangelahealing.as.me/

If you have a topic or a question for us please leave us a comment or voice message on the Anchor App.  You can also listen to this podcast on most major podcast listening  platforms like Apple and Spotify.  Do you enjoy our podcasts? If so, What about becoming a monthly supporter.   Click on the support button in the Anchor App. By supporting this podcast with donations it will help us continue to produce future episodes.  Thank you so much for listening. 

Here is a short audio clip of BBR Podcast – Episode 30 – Getting Over Mistakes and the Fears of Getting it Wrong! ❤️ To listen to the full podcast click ➡️ Episode 30 – Getting Over Mistakes and the Fears of Getting It Wrong!

To listen to the full podcast click ➡️ Episode 30 – Getting Over Mistakes and the Fears of Getting It Wrong!

#podcast #relationshipsathomeandwork #fearofmistakes #fearofgettingwrong #anchorpodcast #listen #thanks

Posted in Blog, Podcasts

Episode 28 – Is It The End of the World? Trusting Your Intuition in Relationships! Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti (Podcast)

In today’s episode, Angela and Patti will discuss trusting your intuition and using it in your everyday life, whether at home or work.

To listen to Episode 28 – Is It The End of the World? Trusting Your Intuition in Relationship!

With all the talk going around about the world ending and let’s forget 2020. Angela and Patti thought this would be an excellent topic to discuss. By using your intuition to discern fiction from the truth. There is so much false information and fear flying around. Yes, some are valid, but what is real and what is wrong?

Bob Proctor Youtube video says – Intuition is God’s way of talking to us each day.  It is through your intuition that you pick up vibrations.  Every question has an answer.  It is the intuitive mind that will pick that up.  

Another point of view is that intuition is your soul talking to you.  An inner-knowing.

What are signs of having good intuition?

❤️ You’re an empath, you can quickly pick up on other people’s emotions.

❤️ You’re a good judge of character.

❤️ You’re a deep thinker, you have vivid meaningful dreams and epiphanies

❤️ You’re open minded, you listen to your heart, and do what is right for you.

Why is intuition helpful?

It is a gut instinct or feeling and the understanding of something; not overthinking it or getting another opinion is just knowing. It’s helpful when you trust your intuition and yourself; you avoid bad situations or relationships.

What are some good daily practices to connect to your intuition?

Patti watched a short Youtube video from Psych2Go and here are some tips.

According to Google Dictionary – Intuition is the ability to understand something immediately, without the need for conscious reasoning.  A gut-feeling about something or someone.

  1. Listen to your inner voice
  2. Meditate
  3. Be creative
  4. Follow your heart and dreams.  Pay attention to your dreams.
  5. Spend time alone and allow yourself to day dream
  6. Pay attention to your environment and others around you
  7. Don’t over work yourself
  8. Don’t attach yourself to negative situations, feelings or emotions.  
  9. Creating peace and balance helps you strengthen your intuition.
  10. We added – Dance with Angela in a online movement.  

(Angela) – If you feel it’s the end of the world.

  1. What are you worried about and why?
  2. What in your life needs extra care?
  3. What is a priority for you?
  4. What part of your life is ending?
  5. Who in your life is important, and why?
  6. What do you want to share with them?
  7. If your life was to end tomorrow, what do you want to leave behind?

These are the sort of questions that will help you see what your fear is getting you to pay attention to and know what you need to manage and what is important. 

(Angela) – I know fear never made my relationship with myself easy, but by asking these questions, I got to see the fear as an ally to get me to pay attention to what my intuition was prodding me to pay attention too.

If you want to dance with Angela, you can find out about her online movement classes with Angela

If you have a topic or a question for us please leave us a comment or voice message on the Anchor App.  You can also listen to this podcast on most major podcast listening  platforms like Apple and Spotify.  Do you enjoy our podcasts? If so, What about becoming a monthly supporter.   Click on the support button in the Anchor App. By supporting this podcast with donations it will help us continue to produce future episodes.  Thank you so much for listening. ❤️

#podcast #intuition #relationships #anchorpodcast #journalprompts #selfreflectionprompts #trustingyourintuition #intuition #anchorpodcast

Posted in Blog, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts

Episode 24 – Building Better Relationships with Social Media! – Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti (Podcast)

In this podcast Episode 24 – Building Better Relationships with Social Media! Angela and Patti discussed the hot topic of social media and how it can affect relationships.

To listen to the full podcast click below: – Episode 24 – Building Better Relationships with Social Media!

We are concerned about how social media can cause hurt feelings, depression, addiction to social media, and comparison.

Here are some reflection questions:

❤️ What makes people feel it’s okay to post things that they would most likely never say face to face or outside of social media?  

❤️ Where does this boldness or insensitivity come from?  

❤️ Is proving your point worth all the drama and losing friendships over?

Today, we would like to explore how to manage some of those difficult behaviors. ❤️ How do we relate to social media in a healthy way? ❤️ Are you taking a break from social media because it is “too toxic?”

What do you find frustrating about social media, what makes it so toxic to you?  We love to hear from listeners if they could share what they find disappointing about social media, why not leave us a comment.

Question to the Listeners: ❤️ What are some of the things you ENJOY seeing on social media. Share in a comment and let us know.

Angela:  I love healing meditations and I share those because I love them.

Patti: I love seeing photos of families having fun together, vacation photos, travel adventures and cute positive memes.

In a previous podcast (Episode 4) we discussed going Beyond Comparison and Accepting One Self. “Cancel culture refers to the popular practice of withdrawing support for (canceling) public figures and companies after they have done or said something considered objectionable or offensive.

Cancel culture is generally discussed as being performed on social media in the form of group shaming.” https://www.dictionary.com/e/pop-culture/cancel-culture

Patti wrote a blog posts similar to this subject called Don’t Be That Guy!   It is about shaming someone or making them the poster child in the workplace. When someone has committed a bad behavior or done something procedurally wrong, in some organizations, they use this term “Don’t be that (Guy) Person” for humiliation or an example of what not to do. I feel this is similar to the cancel culture. In the blog post is a poll.  With this question – Is shaming an effective management strategy?

Angela will be holding gentle movement classes Come September and to be informed  SIGN UP TO HEAR ABOUT CLASSES in the link in the show notes. For me dance and movement are an authentic way to connect to myself and others. https://bit.ly/3fI6EpQ

Thank you for listening and supporting our podcast.  We would love to hear from you about this topic.  Leave us a comment or voice message on Anchor.

Here is a short audio clip of the podcast Episode 24 – Building Better Relationships with Social Media!:

Become a monthly supporter of Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti a podcast. Click on the support button in the Anchor App. “By supporting Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti podcasts through donations this will help sustain future episodes. Thank you for listening and sharing. 🙂 ”

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts, Video

Episode 21 – Lack of Communication and Overworked! – Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti (Podcast)

Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti Podcast Episode 21- Lack of Communication and Overworked! Click on the link below to listen to the full podcast episode.

In this episode, we shared about improving communication with your boss and not overworking yourself while working from home. With a lot of people working from home lately due to the virus, some find themselves working even more hours.

How do you find balance?  

This is a period of change in the way we work, and it doesn’t look like it is going to go back to the way it is – so more change is coming. One of the challenges I hear about is people are working from home and taking care of their children at the same time since daycare services and schools are still closed. They have become the teacher, playtime instructor, nap time enforcer, lunch, and break time scheduler, all while trying to work at home.

Because of the suddenness of the change, many of us have been expected to do extra work without extra pay or support, and there has been little time to talk about the conflicting expectations or changes and how they require extra thought and extra time to implement the changes.

What are some examples that you have seen?

Time management skills and learning what is expected from the boss while working from home. Setting boundaries with the family while working how to do it all and keep everyone calm, productive, and sane.

A routine is good.

Getting up at the same time you would if going into work, eating breakfast as a family, everyone getting dressed, and starting their day. By having a routine, everyone knows what they are supposed to do and are able to get things done. School work, zoom calls, projects, breaks, lunches and dinner, free time and nap time. One of the extra duties is learning how to move things online and deal with new technology or platforms, and this includes changing how we present and share information.

Now we have an opportunity to create a new normal to deal with change. When there are things that require extra thought and extra time, how do you approach your boss, co-workers, or those you work with?

Are you problem focused or solution-focused?

Often when things change suddenly, we focus on not being able to do what we used to do, and this stops us from speaking up about our needs. I’ve noticed people harboring resentments with superiors or employers because they feel they can’t speak up because there is so much change, and they just need to deal with it. But often, a business or employer will also be struggling with the change. If you can respectfully share what you see as not working and what you see as a solution to that lack – then it clarifies for everyone what are possible solutions. And it may spark others to come up with other solutions, including your employer. Avoid the trap of staying quiet because everyone is just trying to deal with the change, but share your ideas respectfully without making people wrong.

Angela is looking for feedback on relationship needs people have in these times of change.

Have people changed their needs and experiences of relationships?

Share your answer to the question above on the Building Better Relationships Facebook group, “What has changed in your relationships because of this virus?” or email us at BBRathomeandwork@gmail.com

Become a monthly supporter of Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti a podcast. Click on the support button in the Anchor App. “By supporting Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti podcasts through donations this will help sustain future episodes. Thank you for listening and sharing. 🙂 ”

Posted in Blog, Business Inspiration, Career Inspiration, Inspirational Moments, Leadership Inspiration, Personal Inspiration, Podcasts

Episode 20 – Making Relationships Effortless! – Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti (Podcast)

In podcast Episode 20 – Making Relationships Effortless! We share examples that stop relationships from being effortless and recommend changing those habits to welcome effortless relationships, whether in the workplace or home life.  To listen to the full podcast episode click below:

Here are some highlight of the episode:

Angela – Patti when I was dancing with a group in the early 2000’s, we used to explore movement that was effortless, and we always knew when things just flowed and we would be amazed.

Then we found we couldn’t repeat that effortlessness because we started thinking about the movement instead of feeling it. We asked what habits as humans do we have that make us drop out of going with the flow. And we discovered the habits of being and thinking that interrupt our heart or force the heart to be something it’s not because you think you should be a certain way.

Angela – What I’ve learnt about effortless relationships, is from the Einstein statement:

“We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”

Patti – How to Break Bad Work Behaviors:

❤️ Identify the behavior or action

❤️ Make the decision to stop

❤️ Replace the habit with something positive

Angela- Making things effortless is enhanced by not coming from old habits of thinking, because old habits of thought made things repetitive and usually stuck or fixed.  Instead – you want to come at things sideways, ask questions that take a person to a different topic or a different way of looking at a topic.

If you want more relationship tips, join our Facebook Group Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti, please subscribe and like to follow this podcast.

Is there a relationship topic you would like us to discuss on this podcast? Please email us at BBRatHomeandWork@gmail.com

If you are struggling and need someone to talk to about your home or work life challenges  Angela and Patti both have one to one coaching packages.  

To schedule an appointment with Angela.

To schedule an appointment with Patti.

Become a monthly supporter of Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti a podcast. Click on the support button in the Anchor App. “By supporting Building Better Relationships at Home and Work with Angela and Patti podcasts through donations this will help sustain future episodes. Thank you for listening and sharing. 🙂 ”